Ruffin It

RE: President Obama’s Support of Gay Marriage - An Open Letter

Dear friends, family, neighbors and the American public:

I write to you today in the hopes that you will take a minute to understand the importance that President Obama’s announcement in support of gay marriage means to those of us that continue to wait for full and equal protection under the laws of the United States.  I write in an attempt to help you understand what it means to have hope reignited and to be legitimized by a sitting President of the United States.  I write to you as a human being that feels love, hatred, joy, sorrow, pain and healing.  I write to you as a person that has a deeply held desire to celebrate my love of another human being openly and publicly while also being afforded equal protection under the laws of the United States.  I write to you filled with hope.

As expected, many gay people in the United States, myself included, were filled with hope after hearing President Obama support gay marriage in the United States.  Our cups, so long drained of any real hope to see a fundamental shift in the United States around equal rights for LGBT people, were suddenly given a spark to reignite our passion to realize lifelong dreams of being able to marry the person we love.  In the hours that followed, I was able to walk a little taller, smile a little brighter and celebrate life louder because of the hope offered by our President.

To those that have joined in our celebration of this moment, I want to thank you for being a vital part of the process for gaining equal rights for LGBT people in the United States.  Your support is more meaningful than words could do justice.  You are our friends, our family and our neighbors.  Thank you.

To President Obama, I thank you for taking the step you took yesterday to embrace gay marriage.  I thank you for giving me a renewed hope of finally seeing equal rights for LGBT people in the United States.  At the same time, I challenge you to see that gay marriage is not a states issue to the extent that the Federal government affords additional rights and privileges to married heterosexual couples.  If the issue is truly a states issue, will the Federal government take out all of the additional rights and privileges afforded to heterosexual couples?  If not, please reconsider your position on these issues.  Without affording equal rights and privileges to same-sex married couples in the Federal laws, the United States will continue to work on the premise of separate but equal.

To those of you that immediately took the opportunity to claim that President Obama’s announcement was “just politics” and merely a means to get “votes,” I ask you to think about what you are saying to the rest of us that have just been given a spark of hope.  Your comments minimizing the President’s support of gay marriage do not hurt the President.  Your comments hurt my friends, my family, my neighbors and me.  When you say that it is “just politics,” you are really saying that the President’s action carries no weight and that we should simply forget it ever happened.  You are telling us that we are silly for having hope for a better future and for hoping to one day be recognized equally under the laws of the United States.  

I ask you, as a friend, to join us in our celebration.  I ask you to understand that President Obama’s comments are not “just politics” to my friends, my family, my neighbors or to me.  They are life changing words that have given us renewed vigor to continue seeking equal rights.  Join us.  Celebrate with us.  Raise your glass to a brighter future for your friends, your family, your neighbors and for me.

Sincerely,

H. Ruffin

Where’s the focus?

In light of Archbishop Rowan Williams’ decision to step down, it occurs to me that much of the dialogue in the Anglican Communion is focused more on those things that are important to people than to the Lord. Perhaps it is time for all of us to renew our commitments towards each other as Sisters & Brothers in Christ rather than spotlighting our differences.

At this point, I do not hold out much hope for that to happen in the near future. Still, I will pray for that and not lose hope in the power of Grace to help us remember.

Lenten Reflection: 05 March 2012

Today’s Reading:  Luke 6:36-38

Jesus said to the disciples, “Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.  Do not judge, and you will not be judged; do not condemn, and you will not be condemned.  Forgive, and you will be forgiven; give, and it will be given to you.  A good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over will put into you lap; for the measure you give will be the measure you get back.”

Reflection:

I wonder what the world would be like if humanity were able to live into this and the other teachings of Christ more fully.  I think it would be a different world.  Instead of living in a world rampant with killing, hatred and condemnation, perhaps we would live in a world where people could forgive each other for imperfection.  

Of course, just as any other person, I, too, am guilty of having judged another.  It is struggle for us to live into the words of Christ and to forgive each other.  However, I also know that when I forgive someone it does a world of good for me.  My heart feels lighter, and I can go on living in the presence of the Lord instead of dwelling on a negative experience.  

Dear Heavenly Father, I come to be in your presence today.  I seek to continue to learn how to live life in a way that rejoices you.  I hope that I will continue to remember to forgive myself and others for imperfection.  I pray that forgiveness can be a cornerstone of my ministry in service to You.  Help me to teach others through my actions of forgiveness each day.  Amen.

Lenten Reflection: 28 February 2012

Today’s Scripture:

Matthew 6:7-15

Jesus said, “When you are praying, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do; for they think that they will be heard because of their many words.  Do not be like them, for your father knows what you need before you ask him.  ’Pray then in this way:  Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.  Your kingdom come.  Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.  Give us this day our daily bread.  And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.  And do not bring us to the time of trial, but rescue us from the evil one.  For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; but if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

Reflection:

It is so easy to judge, isn’t it?  I know that I am certainly guilty of heaping judgment upon another person without a second’s thought.  Yet, when comes to forgiveness, it is most difficult to do.  Our emotions are high, and the last thing we want to do is forgive someone for injuring us - whether that be physically or emotionally.  Yet, forgiveness is exactly what Christ calls us to do, and when we do learn the art, and I emphasize the word art here, of forgiveness, living life seems to take on a whole new light.  We are able to leave the troublesome times behind us and focus on what really matters - taking care of each other and living life as God calls us to.  

As for me, I am probably at the stick figure or finger painting stage of the art of forgiveness.  I understand the concept of art but not quite to the point of producing a Michelangelo.  I get that forgiveness gives me new strength to face a new day, but I still struggle to simply let go and to let God take control.  Try as I might, I continue to fail, but at least I am trying.

Heavenly Father, thank you for the time you have given us on this Earth, our island home.  Help us all to remember to refine the art of forgiveness as we move along this path called life.  May we always seek to live our lives in a way that glorifies you and not earthly pleasures.  Help us to remember each other and help us to learn the art of forgiveness.  

Lenten Reflection: 25 February 2012

Tonight, I pause to remember and to be thankful for all of the great people that God has brought into my life.  Over the past week, I have experienced frustration and joy in a whirlwind of emotions as I draw closer to the eventual date that I am able to leave for seminary.  If it is one thing that the ongoing process of discernment has taught me it is this - you cannot do it alone.  

Without the support of my family, I certainly would not be where I am today as I continue to discern God’s calling for me in this life.  To be clear, I do not speak only of my biological family but also of my family in Fort Lauderdale.  As the whirlwind continued to swirl faster and faster as I approached the center, I was suddenly given a lifeline by my extended family - the people I know and love at All Saints Episcopal Church.  To say that I am thankful for that support is a gross understatement, and I doubt that I could find the words to express my gratitude for the amount of emotional support that has been given so freely.  

I am humbled by the Grace that I have seen in the past week as people worked on my behalf and granted me the opportunity to see God’s Grace at work in my own life.  I am humbled that so many people have faith in my abilities as a person to bring Christ’s message to the world not only in words but also in actions.  I am humbled by the experience of learning to let go and to have God in my life.  

As Jesus called to Matthew to follow Him, I too seek to leave the life I know and to enter into a new life with Christ.  I know that I cannot do this alone as I walk the path seeking Holy Orders.  I know that I must rely not only on my friends and family but also on my faith and my relationship with Christ to see me through troubled times.  Tonight, I give thanks for all of those relationships.  I give thanks to those who support me in my calling to ordained ministry, and I give thanks for Christ’s presence in my life - even when I do not sense it.

Thank you, Lord, for helping me to see your Grace at work in all of our lives.  Help me to remember that you are always there in our lives - especially in the most difficult of times.  I know that You are there to guide my feet along the path.  May I become an instrument to do Your will and may I continue to love mercy, do justice and to walk humbly with my God.

Lenten Reflection: 24 February 2012

Today’s Reading:  Matthew 9:14-15

Then the disciples of John came to him, saying, “Why do we and the Pharisees fast often, but your disciples do not fast?” And Jesus said to them, “The wedding guests cannot mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them, can they? The days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast.

Reflection:

As each Lenten season draws near, I begin thinking of different ways to fast during Lent.  Many people speak of giving something up for the 40 days of Lent - from chocolate to alcohol to Facebook.  While the notion of giving something up is a long practiced tradition, what effect is it having on a person’s relationship with God?  If I give something up that is trivial, am I actually doing anything that will deepen my relationship with God?  Am I giving something up that is coming between God and me?  As today’s scripture tells us, it is more important for us to be in relationship with Christ and to celebrate that relationship than to give up something that will not help us in drawing nearer to God. 

As I move through this Lenten season, I am focused more on drawing closer to God than I am on giving up something for the forty days.  The focus is on living my life in Christ’s presence each day.  I want to celebrate the joy, sorrow, pain and love in life with Christ just as I would with any other friend.  I want God to know that I am eternally thankful for all of the gifts of this life, and I am glad to know that I have a friend in Christ to help me through the difficult times.   

Lenten Reflection: 23 February 2012

As I enter into a new Lenten season, I am making a commitment to practice daily meditation and prayer at least once each day. I am following the practice that St. Ignatius used to center my thoughts and prayers. In the end, I hope the practice helps me develop a deeper relationship with God and teaches me more about living in a Christ-like manner.

Today’s Reading: Luke 9:22-25

Jesus said to his disciples: “The Son of Man must undergo great suffering, and be rejected by the elders, chief priests, and scribes, and be killed, and on the third day be raised.” Then he said to them all, “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.  For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will save it.  What does it profit them if they gain the whole world, but lose of forfeit themselves?”

Reflection:

To take up one’s cross - what exactly does that mean?  Is it simply dealing with the headaches of life, or is there more to it than that?  Obviously, I do not think that taking up one’s cross is as simple as living with the normal struggles of life.  To take up one’s cross and follow Christ is a calling to forsake everything in this life - even life itself - in service to and with our Lord.  Thankfully, I live in a place where I do not have to live in fear of losing my life because of my faith in Christ; however, I do live in a place that does not embrace Christ as a savior.  I live in a place where it is no longer considered “cool” to be called a Christian.  In fact, the term Christian has taken on a strong negative connotation as a result of extremist views within the Christian faith.  In that sense, I live in a place where I must sacrifice acceptance by many people because of my faith.  As such I know that I must not be ashamed of my relationship with God.  I must share my relationship with God through my actions each and every day.  I must learn how to live my live more generously each day and welcome the challenge of sharing my faith with other people.  I must learn to express my faith in Christ in all things - words, thoughts and actions - so that others may see God’s Grace at work in me and thus be curious to explore a deeper relationship with Christ for themselves.  

As I move forward in attempting to strengthen my relationship with God, I must find a way to embrace the radical calling of living life in a Christ-like manner.